Denial

The best-adjusted person in our society is the person who is not dead and not alive, just numb, a zombie. When you are dead you’re not able to do the work of society. When you are fully alive you are constantly saying "No" to many of the processes of society, the racism, the sexism, the polluted environment, the nuclear threat, the arms race, drinking unsafe water and eating carcinogenic foods. Thus it is in the interests of our society to promote those things that take the edge off, keep us busy with our fixes, and keep us slightly number out and zombie-like. In this way our modern consumer society itself functions as an addict.

-A.W. Schaef - When Society Becomes an Addict

Ears

We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.

-Epictetus

Speech in the Dhammapada

Even though a speech be a thousand (of words), but made up of senseless words, one word of sense is better, which if a man hears, he becomes quiet.

Do not speak harshly to anybody; those who are spoken to will answer thee in the same way. Angry speech is painful, blows for blows will touch thee.

They blame him who sits silent, they blame him who speaks much, they also blame him who says little; there is no one on earth who is not blamed.

A man is not learned because he talks much; he who is patient, free from hatred and fear, he is called learned.

Silently shall I endure abuse as the elephant in battle endures the arrow sent from the bow: for the world is ill-natured.

In the body restraint is good, good is restraint in speech, in thought restraint is good, good is restraint in all things. A Bhikshu, restrained in all things, is freed from all pain.

He who controls his hand, he who controls his feet, he who controls his speech, he who is well controlled, he who delights inwardly, who is collected, who is solitary and content, him they call Bhikshu.

Him I call indeed a Brahmana who utters true speech, instructive and free from harshness, so that he offend no one.

-The Dhammapada

Monkey Mind

How hard it is to control the mind!

Well has it been compared to the maddened monkey. There was a monkey, restless by his own nature, as all monkeys are. As if that were not enough some one made him drink freely of wine, so that he became still more restless. Then a scorpion stung him. When a man is stung by a scorpion, he jumps about for a whole day; so the poor monkey found his condition worse than ever. To complete his misery a demon entered into him. What language can describe the uncontrollable restlessness of that monkey?

The human mind is like that monkey, incessantly active by its own nature; then it becomes drunk with the wine of desire, thus increasing its turbulence. After desire takes possession comes the sting of the scorpion of jealousy at the success of others, and last of all the demon of pride enters the mind, making it think itself of all importance. How hard to control such a mind!

-Swami Vivekananda

Who or How?

Do not care about who you are. Simply be attentive to how you are.

In every life situation you cannot avoid a first arrow - pain, anguish, unsatisfactoriness. Let it be.

Often, we condemn, hate, judge, criticize, deny this first arrow, this is like being struck by a second arrow. Let it go.

In most social contexts, we are struck by first arrows, let them be. We are then often compelled to react to those first arrows. When this drive to react arises, be motionless and acutely mindful, then let go of the desire to act or speak to protect who you are.

If we are mindful enough to act and speak from a place of goodwill and wisdom, who we are in this moment becomes how we are, and how we are in this moment is loving and peaceful.

A being of love and peace is a liberated and a liberating being.

Connect!

Project positive feelings on others - feelings of warm care and goodwill - and not only will others benefit, but we will benefit as well. This is because we are not truly separated or autonomous from each other. Projecting love to others is the same as cultivating love for oneself. Project boundless love, and you become boundless love.

When we bring a loving presence and a spirit of non-violence to all that is, we discover that there is a place in us where fear cannot penetrate. This is the result of letting go of a smaller sense of separated self and realizing our unity with all there is, has been and will be.

Experiencing this essential connection is to be a Buddha, to be awake.
Whenever we forget about this unity and hold on to the illusion of a separated self, we are planting the seeds of suffering for all beings.

Be Careful What You Wish For

Go ahead, light your candles, burn your incense, ring your bells and call out to the gods, but watch out, because the gods will come and they will put you on their anvil and fire up their forge and beat you and beat you until they turn brass into pure gold.

-Sant Keshavadas

Tibetan Buddhism

Idle Chatter

"Whereas some priests and contemplatives, living off food given in faith, are addicted to talking about lowly topics such as these — talking about kings, robbers, ministers of state; armies, alarms, and battles; food and drink; clothing, furniture, garlands, and scents; relatives; vehicles; villages, towns, cities, the countryside; women and heroes; the gossip of the street and the well; tales of the dead; tales of diversity [philosophical discussions of the past and future], the creation of the world and of the sea, and talk of whether things exist or not — he abstains from talking about lowly topics such as these. This, too, is part of his virtue.

"Whereas some priests and contemplatives, living off food given in faith, are addicted to debates such as these — 'You understand this doctrine and discipline? I'm the one who understands this doctrine and discipline. How could you understand this doctrine and discipline? You're practicing wrongly. I'm practicing rightly. I'm being consistent. You're not. What should be said first you said last. What should be said last you said first. What you took so long to think out has been refuted. Your doctrine has been overthrown. You're defeated. Go and try to salvage your doctrine; extricate yourself if you can!' — he abstains from debates such as these. This, too, is part of his virtue."

- Buddha
Samaññaphala Sutta

This is advice for monastics. Details of right speech were given in this post

Toddler Altruism

Warneken and Tomasello study

Freedom to be Happy

"What we frequently think about and ponder upon becomes the inclination of the mind." - The Buddha

Courage

Entering the arena tense and with clenched teeth is not a display of true courage.

Courage reveals itself when the heart is allowed to soften and open to what is there.

Fear is not a foe to defeat, but a child to take care of with boundless love.

Warrior

The common person perceives every situation as a blessing or a curse;
blessing leading to attachment, curse leading to aversion.

The spiritual warrior perceives every situation as a challenge-
a challenge to be present and to open the heart.

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.

Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

- Rumi
Coleman Barks translation

Metta Wishes

May you relax into a loving presence.

Free from fear and worry, may you be peaceful.

May you be happy.

:)

Letting Go

The practice of 'letting go' is very effective for minds obsessed by compulsive thinking: you simplify your meditation practice down to just two words – 'letting go' – rather than try to develop this practice and then develop that; and achieve this and go into that, and understand this, and read the Suttas, and study the Abhidhamma... and then learn Pali and Sanskrit... then the Madhyamika and the Prajña Paramita... get ordinations in the Hinayana, Mahayana, Vajrayana... write books and become a world renowned authority on Buddhism. Instead of becoming the world's expert on Buddhism and being invited to great International Buddhist Conferences, just 'let go, let go, let go'.

I did nothing but this for about two years – every time I tried to understand or figure things out, I'd say 'let go, let go' until the desire would fade out. So I'm making it very simple for you, to save you from getting caught in incredible amounts of suffering. There's nothing more sorrowful than having to attend International Buddhist Conferences! Some of you might have the desire to become the Buddha of the age, Maitreya, radiating love throughout the world – but instead, I suggest just being an earthworm, letting go of the desire to radiate love throughout the world. Just be an earthworm who knows only two words – 'let go, let go, let go'. You see, ours is the Lesser Vehicle, the Hinayana, so we only have these simple, poverty-stricken practices!

Ajahn Sumedo - Letting Go - chapter from Cittaviveka – Teachings From The Silent Mind

Reconnaitre les nuages

fichier PDF

The Second Arrow

Bringing awareness to our emotions helps us to have straightforward or uncomplicated emotions. No emotion is inappropriate within the field of our mindfulness practice. We are trying to allow them to exist as they arise, without reactivity, without the additional complications of judgment, evaluation, preferences, aversion, desires, clinging or resistance.

The Buddha once asked a student, “If a person is struck by an arrow is it painful?” The student replied, “It is.” The Buddha then asked, “If the person is struck by a second arrow, is that even more painful?” The student replied again, “It is.” The Buddha then explained, “In life, we cannot always control the first arrow. However, the second arrow is our reaction to the first. This second arrow is optional.”

As long as we are alive we can expect painful experiences – the first arrow. To condemn, judge, criticize, hate, or deny the first arrow is like being struck by a second arrow. Many times the first arrow is out of our control but the arrow of reactivity is not.

Often the significant suffering associated with an emotion is not the emotion itself but the way we relate to it. Do we feel it to be unacceptable? Justified? Do we hate it? Feel pride in it? Are we ashamed of it? Do we tense around it? Are we afraid of how we are feeling?

Mindfulness itself does not condemn our reactions. Rather it is honestly aware of what happens to us and how we react to it. The more cognizant and familiar we are with our reactivity the more easily we can feel, for example, uncomplicated grief or straightforward joy, not mixed up with guilt, anger, remorse, embarrassment, judgment or other reactions. Freedom in Buddhism is not freedom from emotions; it is freedom from complicating them.

From the IMC website

Wait Without Hope

I said to my soul be still, and wait without hope; for hope would be hope of the wrong thing.

-T.S. Eliot

Usually when we wait, we charge the experience with hope or dread. We are living in the future. If instead, we could not shape the waiting with any expectation, but simply be open to what arises, we are not struggling with the way things are in the present. There is nothing to fix. What arises includes feeling the emotions of hope and fear. This time however, they are also witnessed by awareness. "Oh! here's hope, welcome, oh, and this too! welcome!".

Dropping expectations, waiting becomes simply being.

Being Peace

Happiness is not an individual matter. When you are able to bring relief, or bring back the smile to one person, not only that person profits, but you also profit. The deepest happiness you can have comes from that capacity to help relieve the suffering of others. So if we have the habit of being peace, then there is a natural tendency for us to go in the direction of service. Nothing compels us, except the joy of sharing peace, the joy of sharing freedom from afflictions, freedom from worries, freedom from craving, which are the true foundations for happiness.

-Thich Nhat Hanh